Congress manufacturing sleeper cells

By RON BROCHU

Revolution was a frequent topic in the 1960s, but the threat is far greater today.


Average people are much more desperate and disgusted than our detached leaders comprehend – even during quiet moments between ongoing feedings of white wine and quiche with healthcare lobbyists. From Duluth to Tonawanda, highly educated, experienced people can’t find employment; retirees are struggling to survive as their 401(k) balances vaporize; college kids, burdened by massive tuition debt, have little chance of getting their heads above water before midlife. Widespread discontent is beginning to fester.


After caving in for decades to excessive union demands, cities, counties and states suddenly find themselves broke and gasping for bundles of cash to fund expensive benefits that are beyond reach to non-government workers. Programs that serve the poor are in danger of being severely trimmed or discontinued, while common taxpayers must be extra fees to receive services that should be covered by their existing levy. Mainstream workers have grown tired of picking up the pieces.


Still, the Washington banter remains partisan and deconstructive. During the Bush administration, Congress hastily advanced an ill-thought economic rescue plan that already has failed. Despite a staggering price that will choke future generations, it merely helped big banks grow bigger while continuing to perk underachieving executives. Even worse, the massive handout featured the same lack of oversight that originally dragged America into recession.


President Obama’s new plan thrusts the country far deeper into debt but smells heavily of a liberal feeding frenzy. Despite quick passage, virtually everyone anticipates failure.


And for good reason. Just take at look at Duluth’s “stimulus” proposal. Here’s a quick way to spend a quarter-billion of your dollars: Get the feds to fund the school district’s ill-thought and overpriced Long Range Facilities Plan; build a new airport terminal (as if the existing one isn’t big enough to serve one airline); improve airport runways and roads; construct a joint public safety facility and enhance public transportation infrastructure.


The outcome? Create 2,300 jobs – all in construction-related trades. According to 2007 Census estimates, that would provide employment for every Duluth construction worker, plus a few more. Interestingly, 92.6 percent of them are men; apparently women don’t need jobs.


Not all of the local requests are included in our list, but the remainder lean heavily toward more of the same. Basically, it’s the city’s list of state legislative bonding requests.


In essence, it’s a hastily assembled wish list that, coincidently, would create jobs for unions that contribute heavily to whichever party is in power. It’s not a thoughtfully created list of projects that would assist a broad spectrum of unemployed workers in a vast array of professions.


Thus far, Americans have remained passive about Washington’s failure to lead – so much so that most people don’t understand the long-term apathy; hopefully, that behavior won’t become passive-aggressive. But given the widespread pain and discontent, people may begin to act out their frustrations for a variety of reasons:

• The beltway stench grows worse and worse. Recent national elections demonstrate people want to throw the bastards out – the Republicans one year, Democrats the next. Each time, the incoming party is a mere clone of its predecessor. People are coming to realize that everyone in Congress is owned by special interests. Power means everything, constituents mean nothing.


• Politicians and economists alike believe Obama’s latest plan won’t be the last. Another massive bailout will be proposed before 2009 ends, raising skepticism even faster than domestic debt.


• Deficit spending eventually will devalue the dollar, fueling inflation faster than federal presses can print greenbacks. Inflation will outpace wage growth, further decreasing the quality of life for average people.


• Medicare and Medicaid costs will continue to grow, and lawmakers won’t work together to repair the ailing plans.


• Bought and controlled by the medical industry, Congress won’t address health care reform, even as constituents fall through the cracks and silently grow livid.


• Taxes inevitably will have to rise as the country struggles on multiple fronts to solve problems politically rather than intellectually. Eventually, everyone will be forced to repay the cost of Washington’s political ineptitude.

Lawlessness could be an early sign that American life is running amok. Theft already is on the rise as poor people struggle to survive with less and less. It will increase if the middle class loses its footing, its homes and its future.


As national debt grows in tandem with illegal immigration, more and more citizens could refuse to pay their taxes, either in protest or for lack of money. Tax collection or property confiscation efforts would only fuel middle class angst.


If this scenario proves true, well-heeled Americans could pack up the car and move abroad – creating massive out-migration of financial resources. Well-educated young people might follow, taking their skills to more-stable countries while abandoning their college loans. That would dump America’s troubles on those who are stuck behind – the abandoned middle class and growing numbers of poorly educated impoverished people.


Could it really happen? Only time will tell, but we’re off to a great start.
The promise of an Obama presidency brought hope to many, but early evidence suggests he’s just another party hack bent on serving his closest supporters while common citizens pay for the party.


Author Ron Brochu is mad as hell and won’t take it anymore. He archives his rants at www.ronbrochublog.com, where your comment is always welcome.

Some industries deserve regulation

By RON BROCHU

The best way to make a buck in Duluth is to launch a company that uses law enforcement to generate business and strong arm customers.

Say what? How can that be?


Here and in many other areas, these perks are enjoyed by those in the towing/impound biz, a largely unregulated trade that allows some operators to rip off the public while cops turn their back.


Several versions of the game are played every day. One of them involves an expensive shakedown of drivers who park in snow removal zones. It happens like this.


For one reason or another, some folks park in zones marked for snow removal, even though the operation is advertised (in publications they never read) and “no parking” signs are posted. They probably could have avoided a tow.


Later, they find their vehicle missing, then call or visit police. That’s when they discover the equivalent of a ransom scheme. To get their car back, they first need to get release documents from police. But after hoofing it to PD, people learn the release tag can only be provided if they present proof of insurance.


Authorities, of course, urge people to keep proof of insurance in their glove box. So, without their car, parking violators must hoof it to a bus or an impound lot, meet with the owner, remove the insurance card from their car, then tread back to Police HQ.


Impound lots, by the way, aren’t located in spiffy areas. Expect to walk down an alley in an unkempt part of town.


The second trip to impound is the most depressing. It’s when you learn the high cost of lodging an automobile. A few hours behind a chain link fence can cost more than a weekend at the Radisson. If you leave your car there for a day or two, better dig into your Christmas Club account or be prepared to forfeit your title.


Don’t expect to see a rate card conspicuously posted. A sympathetic lot owner might give you a break, but a grump might burn your butt just for the sport of it. Best bet: avoid an argument and don’t flaunt your Rolex.


The game can also go like this. You’re in a collision, and the car is disabled. If it’s blocking traffic, emergency dispatchers will call the first tow truck available, despite the operator’s reputation. If you have a preference or auto club membership, forget it.


I played this game nearly two years ago. My auto was towed to a locked outdoor facility, where an adjuster declared it a total loss. When retrieving personal belongings, several things were missing, including a $200 sleeping bag, FM transmitter and an antique religious pendant. In a subsequent phone call, the tow operator denied anything was missing and loudly slammed the received into his phone cradle.


Then came the lesson about the relationship between police and the tow business. After reporting the missing items to authorities, I was told that anybody could have climbed the impound lot’s fence, and I’d need an eyewitness to identify who burglarized my vehicle. It’s “a civil matter” and authorities wouldn’t do anything, they said, washing their hands of the situation. My only recourse was a small claims suit. Although the impound yard was in Duluth, the operator resided in another state. Any lawsuit would have required me to take time off from work to plead my case before the defendant’s home town judge for a fee of about $80. The odds stunk.


Having an acquaintance in the tow business proved informative. I learned some companies immediately inventory vehicle contents and place them under lock and key.


That’s not required, however. Only top operators go the distance for their customers.


I also learned that nearby communities did very little business with the driver who towed my vehicle. After receiving numerous complaints about missing possessions, they moved his name to the bottom of their call list, a local police chief told me.
But not in Duluth, which (incorrectly) views itself as progressive. It seemed logical, therefore, to address the situation. So I contacted city councilors about the need for regulation. All of them responded to my letter, some even expressing sympathy, but my plea fell from their memory quicker than Gary Doty’s lame administration.


Police Chief Gordon Ramsey referred the matter to an assistant chief, who was to contact me within a few days. It never happened.


The situation is even worse in rural areas, a distressed motorist told me several months later. His pick-up broke down and was towed in rural northwestern Wisconsin, even though he left a note on the windshield saying he’d return within minutes. He claimed it was driven off the state road, yet it was towed and he was forced to pay several hundred bucks to get it back.


This individual alleged the tow operator was paying a kickback to his county sheriff, but it was impossible to prove. Similar arrangements, however, are common in the car repair business. While investigating a franchise opportunity a few years back, the franchisor’s representative taught me the value of working with tow truck drivers. When picking up a dead car, they “highly recommend” your shop, and convince the distraught motorist it’s the best place to fix their vehicle. In turn, the shop pays the truck driver an instant stipend. A nice cash deal.


There are many honest operators in the tow business, but high ethics aren’t universal. Until city councilors tackle the problem (don’t hold your breath), motorists would be wise to ask where their vehicle will be stored, at what cost and whether their possessions will be kept under lock and key. If not, make a big fuss and demand responders contact another tow. State your concerns and hold your ground.


It worked for me recently when the same tow that “lost” my possessions was sent to an accident involving a relative. I voiced my concerns and the traffic officer sent him packing when my AAA truck arrived.


Author Ron Brochu archives his articles at www.ronbrochublog.com, which is linked to several local and regional political blogs.


Published in the Feb. 13, 2009 Northland Reader

Bush doctrine strangled Northland residents

By RON BROCHU

Since the 1960s, Duluth-Superior has seldom been uttered in the same breath as “prosperity,” so residents have grown not to expect much beyond inherent natural beauty and the clean, safe environment. But today’s challenge is much more difficult than usual, thanks to debilitating policies promoted by the Bush administration.
While corporate executives floated to soft landings beneath their golden parachutes:

• 1,900 residents of St. Louis and Douglas counties lost their jobs from January through November, about 1.4 percent of the workforce.

• 7 percent of Duluthians had no jobs in November, according to the latest figures, the highest rate in nearly five years.

Meanwhile:

• Minnesota’s jobless rate climbed to 6.4 percent – double the 3.2 percent when Bush was inaugurated in January 2001.

• Wisconsin’s rate was 5.6 percent compared with 3.7 percent when Bush took office.

Pain regionally and nationwide was triggered by federal decisions designed to generate baskets of money for people just like Bush—those who benefit when government turns its back on long-standing lending and investment regulations. When the house of cards finally toppled, even the wealthy couldn’t recover their losses, forcing Washington to bail out their best campaign contributors.

Dangerously dumb

If lies were money, George Bush would have become the world’s richest man instead of an icon for blissful ineptitude and failure.

While combining free market nonsense with delusions of grandeur, he dragged America out of the fast lane straight into a gaping sinkhole that’s devouring middle class dreams from Pennsylvania Avenue to Skyline Parkway.

According to MSN Money, his presidency cost the country about $11.5 trillion. In contrast, the United States had a $150 billion surplus when President Bill Clinton left office.


Nobody escaped the financial trauma inflicted by the unnecessary $3 trillion Iraq war and multi-billion-dollar bailouts designed to salvage irresponsible Wall Street banks and brokers. Each of us has a story.


About the time Bush Too was elected, I covered northwestern Wisconsin as a business reporter. My stories focused on an overheated economy. Resorts and restaurants from Hayward to Grand Marais were hiring foreign students because full employment had created a shortage of local workers. Fast food joints were paying a couple bucks over minimum wage just to cover their shifts. Property values, particularly for lake parcels, were climbing out of sight. Times were good, but much has changed.


Like many others, my earnings today have declined versus 2001, considering inflation. Like society’s aspirations, journalism and the quest for truth stumbled badly during the Bush presidency, tripped by years of top-level skullduggery that threatened freedom and privacy. The raging economy has been replaced by raging unemployment, record profits by record foreclosures.


Even worse, most educated people, including President Barack Obama, say the worst is yet to come.


My mailbox in December contained a letter from Wells Fargo that illustrates how Bush and his reckless advisors infected the worlds of government and business.


“In a recent account review, we noticed that you have not used your line of credit…for over a year. Since your account was inactive…it has been closed,” wrote corporate vice president Richard Nelson.


His words reflect a rather strange arrogance, considering that Uncle Sam invested $25 billion in Wells Fargo to ensure customers would continue to receive credit. But hubris and corporate handouts walked hand-in-hand during the Bush years – at least for the president’s friends. Firms like Blackwater and Halliburton exhibited both traits with impunity, so why not financial institutions?


Supported by the Troubled Assets Relief Program (“The Bailout”), Wells Fargo followed the most troubling path, purchasing Wachovia Corp., which was choking on toxic investments. The purchase nudged Wells Fargo closer to becoming the nation’s largest bank, increasing its corporate stature. But the investment hasn’t impressed stockholders. Trading at $44.30 on Sept. 19, the bank’s stock price has fallen to the $18-$19 range, contributing to its new credit conservatism. The stated intent of TARP, however, was to loosen credit and spark rebounds in the ailing real estate and automotive sectors.

Lies and damned lies

So far, $350 billion in TARP money has flowed from taxpayers to big business with few strings attached, and without any meaningful administrative restraint.

The inattentive gatekeepers included Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson, the TARP czar unhindered by traditional inconveniences such as congressional oversight, and also the Fed, which has refused to reveal which companies are receiving TARP welfare. But accountability was never important to Bush or his ilk, as Americans learned when weapons of mass destruction were never found in Iraq and torture was secretly sanctioned in Abu Ghraib. Nobody in Washington was ever deemed responsible. Quite the opposite, in fact. Recall that Bush praised Donald Rumsfeld even as the outgoing defense secretary resigned in obvious disgrace.


The fallout, unfortunately, is landing everywhere. Local residents have lost millions in their retirement accounts as stock prices precipitously decline. That forces retirees to spend less at malls, grocery stores, car lots and other places that provide jobs for working age residents. Food shelves are suffering from fewer donations, and the same can be said of other charities that support poor and homeless people throughout the Twin Ports.


Meanwhile, joblessness and uncertainty have convinced many that now isn’t the time to change homes or buy new vehicles. Even those who are still employed fear the recession could deepen, and their instinct is to spend less.


That’s grim news in a metro that was on the rebound. Residential construction in Duluth-Superior has stopped, with some new condo and townhome units sitting unoccupied for months. Talk has ceased about the potential Murphy Oil refinery expansion, as the possibility of finding a multi-billion-dollar private investor has virtually disappeared. Even a downtown walk along Superior Street reflects the downturn, the Athletic Club Deli being the latest victim.


It’s bad enough that some presidents – Richard Nixon, Jimmy Carter, Gerald Ford – didn’t live up to expectations. George W. Bush, however, whipped America into a tailspin from which we may not recover. At the very least, our offspring will be paying the price for decades, and have nothing to show for it.


Published in the Jan. 23, 2009, Northland Reader


Author Ron Brochu archives his stories at www.ronbrochublog.com, where your comment is encouraged.

Digital TV offers faster speeds, better mileage

By RON BROCHU

By this time next month, Duluth’s antenna farm will blanket the Northland with digital TV signals in a foolish technology change that’s already outdated.

Proponents of the analog-to-digital transformation contend the move will improve picture quality, allow broadcasters to offer more channels and help emergency responders by giving them the former TV frequencies. Their overhyped message, however, overlooks much and paints a thin glossy sheen over system flaws.

We need look only at the recent past to debunk claims of improved quality. It’s the same argument made to promote the replacement of vinyl recordings with CDs, and analog cell phones with digital units. The argument for CDs was that they wouldn’t skip like vinyl. That was a crock, crock, crock, crock, crock, crock, crock, crock, crock, crock. Digital cellular, meanwhile, was going to be crystal clear. “Ca you h r me ow?”

Indeed, digital will allow local TV broadcasters to offer more channels. With the same half-million watts, they can pump out several signals. That ignores the fact, however, that just as many signals can be carried to any location in North America by a few satellites that consume only a couple hundred watts of solar energy. So why waste all the costly, scarce fossil fuel to power transmitters in every burb coast-to-coast?

This argument also fails to address the issue of whether local broadcasters can afford to provide multiple channels, particularly in small metros like Duluth-Superior. The advertising pie hasn’t grown in decades. Every year, the slices grow thinner. In a no-growth market, expansion is only possible at the expense of another player. There’s not enough advertising revenue for everybody to survive.

Moreover, how will those additional stations be managed? Hopefully, the common ownership of multiple radio stations won’t serve as the example. Can you say “dead air?” Or how about stations that simultaneously play two overlapping commercials? It’s the electronic equivalent of an erection that lasts more than four hours. Enough already!

The need for emergency responders to have more frequency spectrum grew out of the 9-11 attacks, when intra-agency communication failed miserably. But the added channels are useless unless municipalities can afford new equipment, and most of them can’t. The added channels will be useless without equipment that can put them to use.

A few things are for sure.

• The digital conversion has provided a cash infusion to overseas manufacturers. They’re working overtime to export flat-panel TVs to the United States, increasing our trade deficit.

• Old analog TVs will be cast aside in large number when the conversion takes place. Rather than paying a recycling fee, some owners will carelessly dump them in landfills, ditches or other inappropriate places.

• Some unscrupulous “recyclers” will merely export old televisions to foreign outfits that burn or bury the toxic components, endangering the environment in other countries. Out of sight, out of mind, eh?

But the conversion has some advantages. It will allow Americans to observe their financial demise in high definition. And if president-elected Barack Obama offers another taxpayer incentive package, which is likely, we could learn whether average people use the money to buy necessities or immediately squander it on enormous mind-numbing flat-screen TVs. In our entitlement-oriented society, the answer could be shocking, for most people believe we deserve that bigger, crisper picture even as the economy crumbles – just as they believe we deserve 20 percent annual growth in stock, bond and real estate values – at a minimum.

The digital revolution, unfortunately, has its limits. It won’t propel Duluth out of its budget deficit, Minnesota out of its revenue shortfall nor America out of its credit collapse. No amount of hype, including constant televised ticker-tape messages, will squeeze the city’s retiree healthcare costs into a beautiful new spectrum devoid of whining retired cops. Darn!

Hopefully, the digital signals will perform better when transmitters are raised to full power. Currently, some channels are nothing to brag about, pixilating or disappearing entirely only a mile from Observation Hill. Expect an uproar if the service doesn’t improve.

The conversion’s success could influence the less-hyped move to digital radio, which is taking off like a herd of turtles.

Like digital TV, digital radio more logically would be broadcast from low-power satellites, but that won’t happen. And it also will greatly benefit foreign manufacturers, because American companies no longer make radios, or much of anything for that matter, because we have labor laws and pollution controls. So we can anticipate more U.S. dollars flowing to emerging nations that soon will have a higher standard of living than America, despite their filthy air and water.

This country, by the way, lags others in the digital conversion, just as it lags others in providing broadband internet access – even as we pat ourselves on the back thinking America leads the pack. Our internet access also is among the costliest when compared with other nations, and providers are paving the way to make it even more expensive by limiting the volume of information we can receive without paying a surcharge.

They contend it’s to prevent heavy users from clogging the system, but many believe the true intent is to prevent people from watching the equivalent of television via computer. That, of course, would offer competition to cable TV giants, which seek to monopolize their highly overpriced services, including “bundles” that cost far more than buying individual components from separate providers.

Author Ron Brochu knows a ruse when he sees one. He archives his ramblings at www.ronbrochublog.com, where your comments will be posted whether they make sense or not.

Published in the Jan. 16, 2009 Northland Reader

Canadians will resolve Duluth Heights traffic problem

By RON BROCHU

The solution could be worse than the problem for Duluth Heights residents plagued by discourteous East Enders who race down residential streets en route to Miller Hill stores.

City councilors next week will debate whether to further restrict local traffic to cope with boorish sots who can’t see fit to drive Arlington Avenue between Arrowhead Road and Central Entrance. Councilors will consider a plan that would close Ideal Street and forbid east-bound traffic on a portion of Maple Grove Road as the next logical step to discourage “cut-through” driving. That’s in addition to existing Eklund Avenue barriers designed to prevent locals from being smacked down by drivers who view the neighborhood as their private shortcut.

In a letter to Heights residents, city engineers offer one alternative – remove the temporary Eklund Avenue barriers. That, of course, would be akin to waving a green flag at outside motorists.

The Maple Grove Road restrictions are hardly fair to those who live and pay taxes in the neighborhood. In essence, Heights homeowners would be penalized because outsiders refuse to drive along established thoroughfares.

Additionally, it would force neighborhood motorists to further congest Central Entrance, where rush hour traffic has become intolerable. Each day, more drivers are using East Palm Street to circumvent the 4:30 p.m. bottleneck between Central High School and Arlington Avenue.

The proposals will be reviewed by city councilors at the 6 p.m. committee of the whole meeting on Monday (Jan. 12).

It’s possible the discussion will be moot. Duluth-Superior will soon become part of a new country having ties with Canada, according to a bizarre scenario being advanced by a Russian academic.

The United States will fall apart next year, strangled by economic and moral decay, believes Igor Panarin, dean of the Russian Foreign Ministry’s academy for future diplomats.

“There's a 55-45 percent chance right now that disintegration will occur," Panarin, 50, said in the Wall Street Journal’s Dec. 28 edition. More specifically, he claimed the aforementioned decay – aided by uncontrolled immigration and collapse of the U.S. dollar – will spark civil war.

America, predicts the former KGB analyst, will split six ways along geographic lines, with our neck of the woods becoming the Central North American Republic. Presumably, we’d be answering to Ottowa instead of Washington, Prime Minister Stephen Harper rather than President Barack Obama, Ontario Premier Dalton James Patrick McGuinty rather than Govs. Tim Pawlenty and Jim Doyle.

The change might be advantageous for the Twin Ports, where residents already speak Canadian, drink Molson and worship Alanis Morissette. For instance, Minnesotans could nudge Pawlenty off of his Republican bully pulpit, from which he has vociferously chastised Duluth for being too spendy. There’s little appetite for his fiscal conservatism among our neighbors to the north, although Pawlenty may get some street cred for supporting a larger DECC hockey arena. In the new world order, he and other heavy-handed Republicans will be banished to Fargo, which will become a prison city for wealthy ingrates.

Doyle may survive, given his leftward leanings, but he would have to park the cheesehead and embrace the constitutional monarchy form of government. That could prove difficult. His primary skills are fundraising and pleading ignorance when state contracts land in the hands of overstuffed campaign donors. Those abilities aren’t needed given Canada’s brief election cycles and electoral process.

Unlike remaining regions of the former United States, the Great North American Republic would benefit from Canada’s single-payer health insurance. Small businesses could again afford to insure their employees, and governmental agencies – including cities, counties and school districts – wouldn’t have to constantly wrangle with unions over upwardly spiraling healthcare costs.

A substantially uglier scenario would emerge for America’s existing health system, which is controlled by profiteers and legislative lobbyists, designed primarily to benefit stockholders rather than patients. As the party fizzles, healthcare execs would have to adapt to a life without backdated options, forcing them to drive Lincolns instead of Acuras.

At the street level, Duluthians may actually be able to trade their SUVs for standard cars. Unlike the existing United States, Canada actually invests in its roads, replacing broken pavement with smooth new concrete. Its potholes aren’t large enough to swallow Toyotas, unlike the moonscape left in Duluth by mayors Fedo, Doty and Bergson.

Taxes, unfortunately, would be higher. But society would not collapse, as existing American politicians have led us to believe, nor would freedom disappear, as is evident in Canada and Scandinavian countries that lean toward socialism.

Is Panarin for real or just another publicity hound? It’s anyone’s guess, eh?

Author Ron Brochu archives his stories at www.ronbrochublog.com. He invites your comments.
Published in the Jan. 9, 2009 Northland Reader.

‘Drink baby drink,’ before the party’s over

By RON BROCHU

In the simplistic doll parts world of Sarah Palin, let’s “drink baby drink” on New Year’s Eve. We’re about to board the pain train, and our sensibilities best be numb when Robin Washington and Ken Buehler stoke it toward 2009 at 130 miles per hour.

So far, a trillion-dollar bailout hasn’t derailed the Hell-Bound Express. Even the confidence that accompanies a new president hasn’t generated much hope. So grim is the approaching crash that grown men lay awake at night fearing their snow machines might be repossessed by gun-toting bankers just before a long winter weekend. Even worse, a growing number of jobless households can no longer afford Viagara, thrusting America into a future bereft of drug- induced pleasure – as if the loss of fake wealth wasn’t bad enough.

Sans a miracle, there’s nothing “Happy” to be associated with the coming “New Year,” not even in Lake Wobegon. With the threat of ED constantly blasted into our ears by flaccid television hucksters, including athletes we had envisioned as macho, we haven’t noticed that foreign pawn brokers are buying America for pennies on the dollar, launching a bloodless coup more dangerous than anything al-Qaida has fired our way.

But that’s not a concern in Duluth. The local fear is that neither Asian nor Arab entrepreneurs are stepping forward to deconstruct Great Lakes Aquarium. Their cash is badly needed to recast the sad rubble into wide boulevards on which East Enders can more-recklessly speed through Duluth Heights en route to the mall. After all, we wouldn’t want to blemish Lakeside with hideous commercial development, particularly stores that sell fermented beverages. Better to quarantine such trade in neighborhoods occupied by winos and other blue-collar rummies.

The horror! The horror!

Yes, this will be a challenging year in the Great White North.

• The city of Duluth will struggle from state funding cuts. Union employees will continue to whine about the loss of “work,” a refined way of saying “we want our stinking money!” and we don't give a damn if it thrusts Duluth into bankruptcy. They’ll refuse to acknowledge the revenue shortfall or accept any responsibility to formulate a solution, but instead will blame Mayor Don Ness, his predecessors, successors, friends and relatives. Taxpayers, however, will remain unsympathetic.
  
  
• School Board members will continue to ignore constituents and build Cadillac schools in a Chevy district. Mindlessly following constructionist Keith Dixon, just as they mindlessly followed Julio Almanza’s inert agenda, they will mimic bobbleheads every time the superintendent sentences taxpayers to fund expensive capital experiments and other poorly studied schemes that even teachers deem ridiculous.
  
  
• If the stars align, cash-strapped Duluthians might start listening when Gov. Tim Pawlenty waxes indignant about excessive local spending. Finally hit in the pocketbook, taxpayers may finally begin to question why so much municipal money is spent on non-essential services while their neighborhoods become more dangerous by the day and streets crumble underfoot.
  
  
• An unprofessional core of St. Louis County commissioners will continue to behave like pubescent boys. To demonstrate their power, they’ll hand the county administrator job to interim honcho Alan Mitchell, who will permanently oversee the area’s largest tax sinkhole and let boys act like boys. Local reporters, who think the mil rate is a new appetizer at the Green Mill, won’t cover the story until an irreversible vote has already been taken.
  
  
• Even as the OmniMax Theatre and Great Lakes Aquarium bleed dry, consultants will continue to paint a rosy picture of the proposed high-speed Duluth-Twin Cities train. Like weather forecasters and computer techs, consultants will draw bloated paychecks even if their work is flawed -- even if it’s pure nonsense designed only to endorse what promoters and politicians want to hear. When the venture fails miserably, nobody will be held accountable, just as nobody has been outed for the theater and aquarium failures. Again, taxpayers will eat the tab, and again, they’ll re-elect the same Democrats who repeatedly secure federal grants for doomed ventures, using it to leverage state loans, which in turn leverages local bonds in a gamble better suited for a casino. All the while, experienced private sector businessmen remain silent for fear of endangering their own sweetheart TIF deals.

That’s the dire picture in a city where financial and political incompetence has become institutionalized. Those of us who stay here obviously support this brand of ineffective hocus pocus, even as Duluth gasps for air. Rather than speak up, opponents flee to Hermantown, Proctor, Esko, Carlton, Wrenshall and Cloquet, where there’s less of an appetite for sure failure.

It’s a recipe for disaster that could bear an abundance of fruit as the economy degenerates during 2009.

Writer Ron Brochu barks like a rabid dog during lapses when he can’t afford professional therapy. He archives his goofy ramblings at www.ronbrochublog.com and invites others to join the rant, even though most people, including outright misfits, have better things to do.

Published in the Dec. 26 Northland Reader.

Mindlessly groping for fat, daily rags eat the seed corn

By RON BROCHU

Most people won’t buy a crappy car, and few automakers would survive if their vehicles offered less and less each year. Same goes for every other product on the market. Who would buy a new smaller model that offered fewer features than the last one? Customers want more and better, and they sure won’t pay more to receive less. Imagine the reaction if Wal-Mart adopted a new slogan: “Pay More, Get Less.”

Ironically, that’s the direction daily newspapers are heading. Fewer local stories. Subscriptions that cost more. Higher advertising rates. It’s a fatal business plan that publishers refresh each time profits droop.

As if that’s not bad enough, editors pen columns about the fantastic bargain newspapers offer customers, who they obviously regard as money-burning idiots. It raises an obvious question: How can readers trust anything the publication says when its top dog utters such nonsense?

Pure and simple, fear and desperation are gripping the industry as it’s being weaned from a fat hog. For decades, daily newspaper publishers have sought profits in the range of 20-40 percent, raising advertising rates to support their tremendous appetites. With bellies bulging past their brows, they’ve not noticed the inability of advertisers to pay their growing rates – from local retailers to the average Joe selling his Chivvy.

Which brings us to last Monday, when one of America’s largest newspaper firms became the first to declare bankruptcy. Tribune Co., publisher of the Chicago Tribune, Los Angeles Times and numerous smaller newspapers, sought court protection from its creditors. Tribune won’t be the last. Since midyear, the Minneapolis Star Tribune has been unable to repay its debt and is high on the list of Chapter 11 candidates.

Losing readers to the Internet is a growing problem in the forlorn world of daily rags. But for many newspapers, debt is the bigger issue. Acquisition frenzy erupted following the senseless breakup of Knight Ridder Inc., former owner of the Duluth News Tribune, St. Paul Pioneer Press and about 30 other dailies. By and by, a series of America’s biggest newspapers were acquired by companies that borrowed heavily just before the economy fell into freefall. Declines in auto and real estate advertising have left publishers unable to repay their ridiculous debt loads, and the credit crisis has prevented restructuring.

Duluthians have witnessed it before (with devastating results) when Harcourt Brace Jovanovich Inc. followed a poisoned pill strategy to avoid hostile takeover by Robert Maxwell. In the aftermath, William Jovanovich put his publications division for sale to secure a quick cash influx. A local acquisition group led by Robert Edgell bought the property in a highly leveraged deal that closed shortly before the economy tanked. As failure became unavoidable, Edgell leaped to his death during a Thanksgiving dinner.

Desperation has a troubling rhythm that triggers wrongheaded decisions. For instance, newspaper owners today believe they can cut their way to profitability, even though they’ve already sliced through muscle into the bone. Nervous editors are sacking anyone who earns too much money – in other words, their most experienced reporters and middle managers. They’re also dumping their most interesting content – the features that competitors lack the time and/or staff to duplicate – along with high-demand add-ons such as TV listings.

To be kind, let’s call it “shortsighted” rather than something more appropriate, like “suicidal.” How long can shortsightedness survive during a lengthy downturn? Hard to tell, but its shelf life certainly is shorter for companies having significant debt. That includes Forum Communications, which borrowed from a consortium of lenders to buy the DNT, its affiliated area publications, and the Grand Forks Herald. Because the company is privately held, its financial strength is a closely held secret. Its aggressive local cuts, however, suggest finances are a concern. Perhaps losses are not an issue. Maybe the concern is just to ensure the Trib remains a cash cow, an admirable goal in the self-infatuated publishers’ club.
There are historical certainties.

• The Trib and other dailies won’t grow back to their former physical size, even if newsprint prices decline. While editors often blame their woes on paper prices, they’re silent when prices drop, which is a certainty. Excess manufacturing capacity prevents paper firms from sustaining higher prices.
  
  
• Former features won’t return. Once they disappear, they’re gone for good. Even if those features were popular, editors hate to admit they acted in error. It’s an ego thing. Most believe they were ordained, not hired, into the profession.
  
  
• Efforts to mimic gossip tabloids will fail at the local level. People love a screaming headline trashing Britney Spears; they cancel subscriptions when the venom is directed toward Aunt Millie.

Former Superior Daily Telegram Editor Ron Brochu saw the light after being booted from the ranks. He archives his articles at www.ronbrochublog.com and invites your silly comments.

Published in the Dec. 12 Northland Reader.